Free

So i am not sure what happened between yesterday and today but i feel free. Free to be myself, free to lose weight at whatever pace i lose it, Free to go to the gym and look a fool if i want to, Free to look in a full length mirror and be proud of the work i have done, Free to appreciate what i have and what i am working so hard to accomplish, And free to make a mistake and over come it.   Yes i am that girl you will see driving down the road singing at the top of her lungs and dancing with my babies in the car, yes i am the girl at the gym who works out to her music i walk and run and bike and dance while i do it sometimes, Yes i have finally become that girl who truly loves herself even at over 300lbs because i am worth it. I am worth all of my own love and all of my own affection. I am worth all the effort i am putting in to lose the weight to better myself and become the me i in-vision i am. I am also free and worth telling the devil to back the fuck off. Sorry for my language but im pretty sure thats why i am feeling so good today. I made a deceleration in my own life yesterday that my faith is stronger then the devil and he needs to get the hell away from me.
  So from now on i will show myself love, I will see my body for the greatness it is, My body made four beautiful children, it has nursed them and lifted them and loved them and now its time for me to love it. I also for the first time this morning wasn't ashamed when i looked in those huge mirrors at the gym and saw myself for what i really am. I see a woman who is strong, fierce, sassy, lovely, caring, loving, friendly,beautiful, pretty, God fearing, hard working, dedicated, motherly, and well rounded. So yes i may not walking into that gym and be the smallest, or the fastest, or the prettiest, but I will walk in there with my head held high i know what i am doing i know what im going after and i know I WILL DO IT!

So these are the flowers i bought myself today, cause i no longer need anyone else to affirm love for me, I can love myself and its ok to show myself appriecation. 

This was me at the gym getting off the elliptical if i had known my face would change three more shades before i started to cool down i would have taken that picture but i worked my ass off this morning even if it wasn't that long it is def a start.

This is my pounds that i already kicked to the curb jar, as of today i am down a total of 87lbs and 31 of those are from since i had surgery jan 27th 2014. 

And this is the seal the deal picture, are you willing to kick your own ass, and this could mean something as simple as walking across the house an extra time a day and working your way up but everyone has to start somewhere. 

So God bless you all hope your doing well in your life changes how ever you are going about them. 

Happy life changing everyone.